Popping the top

The 2006 PPGA season teed off on Sunday, April 23 at Quincy's Westview Golf Course in the first Mark Christensen Memorial Tournament.

Seven PPGAers showed up, including some old dude named Bob.

Claiming the crown was WGEM producer Broc Hampsmire. He may not get it done on the radio, but Broc the Rock got it done on the course for his first PPGA win since having his ex-officio status stripped from him after actually finishing behind Noodlehauser at the Russ Michna event in Macomb back in 2004.

Hampsmire shot an 84 to edge PPGAer Don Crim and ex-officio member Chuck Mahon by two shots. (By the way, I'm thinking of stealing a Masters tradition and calling those too good to play with us "non-competing markers.")

I'm also tossing out a rules change for you all to chew on. After watching Broc three-putt for bogey after winning a greenie (which I did later in the day because I suck), I think we should have to validate our greenies by at least making par. If you don't validate, you lose the dough and it rolls over to the next green. Again, a bold step for the PPGA, actually making someone earn something, but it's something we should do. We're not as bad as we used to be. I felt ashamed to take the greenie after three-putting from 15 feet. It's just not right. We should all feel the same pressure as Duce and Weast walking up to the half-drunken ladies at the Abbey on a Saturday night. Feel free to discuss on the message board.

Now back to your regularly scheduled recap of the Christensen Memorial.

FedEx Bob (Noodle's boss) claimed two greenies (legitmately, I might add, including a birdie on No. 11), while Broc and I shamed our way into the winner's column.

Our Slappy of the Week and the Hardcore champion are one in the same - Ervin. He got the Hardcore for shooting an even-par 100 on the hard-baked fairways and greens of Westview.

By the way, what's up with the ghetto scorecards? Is the Park District cutting costs and having Gordon stand at the copier all day to hand these bad boys out. It's as cheap as the sweatpants Schuckman was wearing on Sunday, our first fashion victim since CB from the WG showed up wearing Wranglers and Nikes at Palmyra a few years back.

EE gets the Slappy honors for trying to quit after No. 1, 2 and 3. Didn't help that he took the commish's clubs out of his bag on the No. 11 tee and littered them all over the ground. I'm surprised he didn't pee in my water bottle, too.

Our next PPGA outing will be on Sunday, May 7. Offer up any suggestions for where we should play, I'll book something early next week. Keeping checking the blog for updates.

Here are our first batch of stats. Enjoy!

And remember, you non-competing markers (sounds good, doesn't it?) don't count because you shouldn't be playing with our sorry asses anyway. But we like it when you show up!

The PPGA Order of Merit
Hampsmire 84
Crim 86
DOB 91
FedEx Bob 93
Schuckman 94
Ervin 100

Birdie leaders
FedEx Bob 1
Hampsmire 1
Crim 1

Par leaders
Hampsmire 7
Crim 6
Schuckman 4
DOB 3
FedEx Bob 3
Ervin 3

Gough leaders (making a 12 on a hole)
None

Greenie money leaders (money won, number of greenies won)
FedEx Bob ($14, 2)
DOB ($7, 1)
Broc ($7, 1)

Championships (where won)
Hampsmire (1, Westview)

Hard-core titles (where won)
Ervin (1, Westview)

The 2006 PPGA lid-lifter

Gang,

We'll start the 2006 PPGA campaign on Sunday, April 23 at Quincy's Westview Golf Course. I've got two tee times set for 9:44 and 9:52 a.m. That means the field will be limited to eight players.

I know we've gone to Barry in the past to start the season. I know people like Schuckman love tradition. Heck, the only pieces of PPGA hardware I own are from the Bruner Battle at Barry.

However, I think I'm turning into a bit of a golf snob. (Playing Augusta National must do that to you. Just kidding.) Seriously though. Maybe I'm lazy, but I'd rather go to Westview, which is right in our backyard, and spend money there rather than get in the car (especially with gas at $3 a gallon), go to some goat track and knock it around. This way we get to sleep in a little later and get back home at a decent time without having to travel.

Now, this isn't to say we're not going to hit the road. I still think Hamilton, Camp Point, Hannibal and Monroe are decent courses. Now that we don't all suck as bad as we used to, I don't know that we need to get ready for the season knocking it around places like Barry and Palmyra (to name two).

Let me know what you think.

The Commish